pen & paper

Photo by Athena

Do you have things you collect? Something that if your spouse/significant other/parents tried to throw away would turn into a huge battle? I do. And Steve knows better than to do anything with them. Don’t touch, move to somewhere I can’t find them, or even dare to put them in a place where they could potentially be damaged.

No, it’s not my magazine collection. Which I do have an unnatural obsession with magazines and a hard time parting with them. I love the freshness of them: the pictures, articles, and even the ads (I know, it’s a sickness).

My favorite collection is all the letters and cards I have received over the years. If you’ve sent me a birth announcement, Christmas card, birthday card, random note, whatever, there is a strong chance that I still have it. I have shoe boxes full of cards.

I’m not quite sure when this love of cards and letters began, but I have at least 20 years of them. Every once in a while I will go through a box and read all the cards, trying to remember when I received them. This past weekend was one of those times. I was going through a drawer and found a letter I received from my “Non” (mom’s mom). She sent it to me on one of my birthdays. It is a handwritten, three page letter with the traditional birthday wishes and a funny story to add. (One of these days I will post some of Non’s letters. She had a beautiful handwriting that people don’t use anymore and a whit that is hard to match.)

This particular letter is extra-special to me… it is one of the last letters I received from her. The letter is still in the envelope she hand addresses – no return address labels for her. And inside the letter are the crisp bills she sent for my birthday – $34 I think.

It’s not a fancy card. Not written on cute paper. Just three pages, handwritten on classic white stationary, with wishes for a great year and love from my Non. I miss my Non terribly, but I have something I can hold on to that she penned, just for me.

I am a huge fan of electronic media – email, text, Facebook, Twitter, blogs – I’ve got them all. But there is nothing like a handwritten note. I think today I’ll take some time to write a few notes… who knows, maybe it will end up in someone’s shoe box.

Giving Credit Where It’s Due

Photo by Olilly

A big part of my everyday job is to know & understand the copyright laws.  I am usually approached with the conversation starting something like, “I’m not sure if this is legal or not, but…”  Some times the answer is just as simple as an email to the copyright owner and we have the permission needed to use the item in question.  Other times it can be a long process of research, forms, money, and waiting.  It can be a lengthy and expensive process.

Why should we even bother with the copyrights?  Why can’t we just use the item and then ask for forgiveness if we get caught?

Do you remember the days of the group projects in school?  The teacher would put you with a partner and you would all receive the same grade for the project.  Did you ever get stuck with someone who “let” you do the entire project?  Remember the frustration you felt knowing they did nothing to contribute, you did all the work, and your lame-o partner got the same grade as you thanks to your hard work?

The same still stands today, but on a much bigger scale.  People everywhere are spending hours on designs, writings, videos and putting them out over the internet for all to see.  They put their work out there to have their voice heard and work seen by many  Yet there are people everywhere who are taking stuff, putting it on their own sites, claiming it as their own and never giving credit to the creator.  Now, most people who put stuff on the internet aren’t looking to get rich or famous, but do expect the respect of someone who uses their work to give them credit.

I follow a number of blogs that cover a wide range of topics.  Today I was reading the Tip Junkie blog, where she covers a simple way for bloggers to display their desire for how other can use their work.  I recommend reading this particular entry, then stay on her blog and read some of her tips… it’s a great, fun site.

A big part of social media today is to talk about something you read, saw, experienced, heard… just be sure to give credit where it’s due.

Working 9 to 5

I promise not to tell your boss what your answer is.

3 little words

I told you back on New Year’s Eve that I was formulating my 3 word phrase that I would live by for this year.  I learned long ago that making a New Year’s resolution is usually a waste of time for me.  I have made many resolutions over the years that are usually forgotten before January is even over.

Last year I read an article posted by Kem Meyer about 3 words for 2009.  I took the challenge and did fairly well for the entire year keeping them in mind.

This year, I decided that instead of choosing 3 independent words, that I would instead have a 3 words phrase for 2010.  So… drum roll.. my phrase for 2010 is “Stick to it”.  Monumental, I know.  Over the top creative.

Ok, so granted, it’s not the most creative phrase and not really something new, but that phrase embodies a desire I’ve had for a long time.  I am a natural procrastinator.  My childhood friend gave me a sign for one of my birthdays that said “Why do today what you can put off until tomorrow.”  I hung that sign proudly over my bed.  I don’t think the sign gave me that idea, it just helped me realize a tendency I always had.  In college, I would put off the big assignment until a few days before it was due and spend many sleepless nights completing the project.  And inevitably at the start of each semester I would vow to change my ways and spread out the work only to arrive to the end of the semester again with a pile of papers due.

As I get older, it is easier to have ideas of something I want to do, but allow excuses and work and family to squelch those ideas… (I am a 30-something who has plenty of years to do x,y,&z.)  I really want this year to be different.  I want to stick to the plans I make and achieve the goals I have set.

So, as I live by the phrase “Stick to it” here are the things this year that I will accomplish:

• Run – I have started the Couch to 5K and will run the Race for the Cure in May.  I will continue my running schedule and will train for the Suntrust Half Marathon in November (a friend wants me to do a sprint triathalon in October…)
• Eat – I am living by the principles laid out in the Eat Clean Diet (I’ll spend a few other blog posts talking about this fabulous book.)
• Read – I am following the daily Bible reading plan as created by youversion.com on my cell phone.

There, I did it.  I’ve put into writing, for all to see, and have allowed myself to be subject to questions of how I am doing with my plan to “Stick to it.”

So far, so good.

A New Kind of Sandwich

There are many things that happen to “other” people that I didn’t think I would ever be a concern for me.  I have learned over the years to never say “I’ll never” and when I think that something won’t happen to me that I shouldn’t even breathe those thoughts.

The past 4 years have been a new adventure for me, my brother, and my family.  We didn’t expect to be responsible for the care of my mom – at least not for a while.  While I am so thankful that she has made an incredible recovery from her injuries, the reality is that she will never be able to live on her own again.  I found the following video which I wished I had seen long before now.  Many of the tips in there I discovered the hard way.

I’ve never been one to enjoy looking way into the future and trying to predict the unknown – I think I would have built a house with bubble wrap on every surface had I known what was coming.  But this video is a great “think ahead” type tool that is useful for anyone with aging parents.

…just as in Christ God forgave you.

Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

Photo by Bob.Fornal

GOD FORGAVE ME! I love that.  I don’t have to live in fear of being flicked off the earth by a God who is fed up with me and my actions. He hasn’t kept a list of everything I have done wrong and decided He’s finished with me when I fill up the sheet.  Through Christ’s death on the cross, I can have complete forgiveness. And I do. As a teenager, I heard a message of God’s forgiveness and couldn’t accept it fast enough. I wanted freedom from the guilt I carried.

God has given a huge challenge to us through this verse. There is a lot packed into these 17 words.  Kindness.  Compassion.  Forgiveness.  What a great world we would live in if everyone would practice these three words. Instead of telling others to live these words, I challenge you to live these three principles daily.  Be kind to everyone.  Smile and say a kind word to the cashier. Look for the needs around you. Help that neighbor who has fallen on hard times.  Swallow your pride; offer forgiveness even if you don’t think one deserves it. While we might not change the world, we can change the world of those around us.

…forgiving each other… Part 2

Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

Photo by Ikes

Now, I know I am not the only person who struggles with unforgiveness and bitterness.  I had a conversation with a friend who recounted a story from over 20 years earlier of a slumber party she had been invited to. She was still angry over 20 years later by the comments of the 8 year-old host about bringing a stuffed animal to the party.

As Christ-followers, we have to pay attention to every part of this verse, even the part that we would rather skip over. When Paul says “forgive each other”, he means everyone – your boss, coworker, wife/husband, child, parent, grandparent, neighbor, friend.  Whoever it may be. Unforgiveness really doesn’t hurt the other person. It may sound cliché, but you are only hurting yourself and those around you who have to deal with the grumpiness that your bitterness brings.

Most likely the person doesn’t even know he or she wronged you or thinks that the issue was resolved and has moved on. Not always is it possible to have an actual conversation with the person you need to forgive. I’ve found that driving in my car alone is a great time to have the forgiveness conversations. One time I had three different forgiveness “talks” with the same person who wasn’t present. My statement in each conversation was, “I forgive you for what you have done”. Each conversation had a different response.  The first was, “I am so sorry. Thank you for your forgiveness.” The other two conversations weren’t so easy because one response was, “I didn’t do anything wrong.” And the other was complete silence.  While I will never have the opportunity to have a conversation with this person, it was freeing for me to have these three imaginary conversations.  I was ok with knowing that no matter what the response was, I was offering my forgiveness. I had to be free.

Whom do you need to forgive? Whom do you need to ask forgiveness? It may not be appropriate or helpful to approach the person. You may need to write a letter that you never send, have an imaginary conversation, or have a trusted friend play the part of the person. Just be free from the weight that unforgiveness brings.

…forgiving each other… Part 1

Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

Photo by Mads Boedker

As a child, I had many great toys. I had some of the classics – a Slinky which I sang the song to as I tried in vain to get it to go down our entire flight of stairs, the Rubik’s cube which I learned was easier to solve by actually taking it apart and putting it back together, and a banana seat bicycle with the ringy bell.  But one of my favorite things to play with was my dad’s big magnifying glass.  I would take it all around the house making everything look big.  When I would get bored with the inside stuff, outside I went to find a piece of wood that I could burn my name into. (No I didn’t head straight for the ants, my husband was the one who did that.) I thought it was so cool that by taking a magnifying glass and angling it just right, the sun would make a beam that could burn the wood and anything around it.

Magnifying glasses are great inventions; they make really little stuff big enough for us to see the details.  Electronic microscopes make stuff that we didn’t know existed visible to our eyes, some of which I would have rather never known about.

I’ve noticed that when I am angry, my mind takes an imaginary magnifying glass and shows me every little annoying thing.  I could be angry at someone specific, or just circumstances in general. It doesn’t matter. When I am angry, every little thing becomes huge.   When I let the anger fester, I am no fun to be around. Every little thing is irritating. “Am I the only person in this house who is capable of taking out the trash?”  You know how it goes.  I could be angry about a conversation I had with the credit card company and end up grounding my children because they sneeze too loud.

Unforgiveness, bitterness, anger are huge issues that are so damaging to our lives. What is it that makes your anger flare? When you are angry, what are some of your normal responses?

To be continued…

…and compassionate to one another…

Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

Church of the Nazarene photo

The recent earthquake in Haiti has brought the word Compassion to the forefront of many of our minds.  When I hear the word compassionate, my mind goes to the television commercials for the organizations that are making a positive difference in our world. Through child sponsorship, food, health care, clothing, education, skill training, Christian teaching, and more these groups are reaching our world on a grand scale. They are going into the forgotten areas of the world and showing Jesus’ love.

When I read in the Bible that I am to be “compassionate to one another”, it feels like an insurmountable task. How am I to do all of these things that being compassionate means and still take care of my family, work, have friendships, be in a small group, attend church on Sunday, and maybe an afternoon nap?  Then the Holy Spirit brings a flood of people to my mind – the single mom trying to support her family and still be a great mom to her kids, the widow whose grass is so high who knows what is hiding in it, the teenager whose dad has lost his job and is working odd jobs to have enough money for school supplies.  The list goes on and on. Do you get the idea? You probably have your own set of faces that come to mind.

With so many needs in our world and in our own sphere of influence, where do we start? One face at a time. Pray and ask God for what He wants you to do. Who is the one person to whom you can show compassion? Maybe it’s simply offering an evening of babysitting or mowing their grass. Maybe it’s being involved in one of the local or regional serve projects through church. Maybe it’s getting involved in a ministry and sharing your life experiences and learning with others.

Ask God. He always has someone in mind to whom you can show compassion.

Be kind…

Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

Photo by Eric E Johnson

Many things happen on a school bus. I’m sure if you ever had the pleasure of riding a bus to school, you know exactly what I am talking about. The daily negotiating of the perfect seat, the obnoxious songs that never end (Zach happens to be singing one right now), and the endless chatter. One thing that seems to be forgotten on many school buses is the Golden Rule. You remember learning that: “Treat others as you want to be treated.” Funny thing is it’s not just on the school bus where the Golden Rule has been forgotten.

Each day in the workplace employees are doing whatever it takes to get ahead, at the expense of their coworkers. At home, families are looking more like war zones than a place of safety. Grandparents have never seen their grandchildren because of something that happened years ago… quite possibly the details are long forgotten but the anger is still there. Neighbors are not acting so neighborly and everyone on the block knows it.

Kindness… this is not a new concept and not something just taught in the church. Children are taught from a young age to “play nice”, share, say kind words, and don’t hit your brother. Yet it seems the lesson is never learned. No matter the age, harsh words are said, feelings are hurt, and relationships are broken.

Are you kind? Have your actions lately been showing others kindness? Maybe you would say you are kind, but you know that you always tell people what they want to hear. Being kind without being honest can be almost as hurtful as never being kind.